In December I had conversation with a colleague of mine about gay marriage. I was very confused about the fact that a civil partnership wasn’t actually a marriage, (some of you reading this will be thinking ‘thick shit’) I will tell you why.
I’m not religious, I’m also not bothered whether I do or don’t get married, indifferent you could say. If I was to get married it would be a civil ceremony to my man (I’m a woman), which I thought was the same as a gay couple. Neither couple is getting married in a religious place, it’s a civil ceremony. But why would I come out having a civil wedding and being ‘married,’ when 2 people of the same sex are committing themselves to each other, there’s would be a ‘civil partnership’? Something doesn’t seem right or very fair to me!
What hacks me off even more was that when researching the difference online, I discover that 2 catholic countries in Europe, Spain and Portugal allow same sex marriage as well as a handful of other European countries. How did the UK become so backward?
After doing some online research, it appears that if you are married or in a civil partnership, you have the same legal rights (this is good and equal). The difference is religious groups/ organisations are not permitted to perform same sex marriages (although MP’s have now voted in favour). To really add confusion, a man and a woman who wish to be together aren’t allowed to have a civil partnership, still needs to be a civil marriage.
What I find sad in all of this is that it just doesn’t appear equal to anyone. If you happen to believe in a particular religion and are gay, why on earth should you not allowed to be married by your chosen religion and it be legally recognised? Equally, why on earth because I’m not religious can’t I have a civil partnership instead of a marriage?
Marriage rates in the UK are decreasing along with divorce rates; you could argue this is due to a recession, lack of money. Although, could it be one of the following?
- People aren’t marrying their child hood sweet heart, like they did 20 / 30 years ago
- People are realising what they want and value their own self worth
- People now entering into relationships as equals
In fact why should a piece of paper state how much you love someone? It’s about working as a team and an equal partnership, both bringing something to the relationship helping the other person grow, supporting one another.
If some religious organisation or an out dated institution can’t recognise the love you have for each other, then quite frankly Fuck them, you are better off without them (although I get it’s the principle). As part of my protest, until they re-write the constitution and take out all the sexism, oppression and it’s the same set of rules for all, I have no intention of getting married.
If you want to find out more about what the different reactions to the recent vote in Parliament from the figure heads in the different churches and religious groups in the UK, please take a visit to the Guardian’s website.